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Sunday, February 27, 2011

New Labels and a Crazy Busdriver

I haven't been very dedicated to using labels, but I decided to start a new one for Mega Meltdowns. These may be meltdowns I've experienced or witnessed. Since I'll have plenty of my own to relate, I think I'll start by sharing one I witnessed.

When I was in 5th grade, we had the BEST bus driver named Jack. He brought us fireballs on Fridays and rarely raised his voice to us. He was kind and elderly, and I think I cried the day he retired. This is NOT a story about Jack.

We had another bus driver when I was in 3rd grade. I think her name was Cory. She wasn't awful at first, but then she snapped. I think we were all in the middle of singing a lovely song called, "I Know a Song That Gets on Everybody's Nerves" when she lost it. Not exactly good behavior on our part, but I don't think it warranted the reaction we got.

She pulled the bus over to the side of the road, got off, then proceeded to bash her head against a tree. I'm not kidding. My brother and I still try to pick out which tree when we pass that spot. She also muttered a horrible string of obscenities while continuing to bang her head. Did I mention my poor little brother was only in kindergarten?

Cory got back on the bus and obviously we stared at her in stony, horrified silence. She screamed at us saying, "If you don't sit down and shut up, I will ram this bus up the curb and kill us all! Don't think I don't know how to do it!"

As if the tree scene wasn't terrible enough, she was now threatening to kill us. Please keep in mind that elementary school kids couldn't really understand that driving a bus up a curb going 30 mph at most wasn't going to kill anybody; we took her threat seriously. As you can imagine, we were quiet the entire drive home. We quietly filed off the bus at our stop. Waited until the bus was out of site. Then bolted home to cry to our mommy. I'm pretty sure that's the same thing every other kid did, meaning the school district got about 40+ complaints from irate (times infinity) mothers about the maniac bus driver.

As an adult I realize that poor Cory must've had some terrible demons she was fighting. I hope that she's won that battle by now. And I will say this. At the time we were all pretty scared, but I don't think it actually scarred me for life. Plus, it makes for a pretty crazy story. So, no hard feelings.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

A Sweet Memory

WARNING! This is mushy and churchy. Please read no further if you're opposed to either of these two things. Or both.

Today is my friend's birthday. I don't think she reads my blog otherwise I probably wouldn't post this. She will always, always be special to me. See, in high school I heard this talk where this was said:
We are asking you to reach out and share the gospel of Jesus Christ with one other young woman so that she can also enjoy the sweet blessings of heaven that we have spoken of tonight. - Margaret Nadauld
I heard those words and they went deep into my heart. I prayed and fasted to know who that one other young woman was to be. I loved all of my friends and wanted them all to feel the peace and happiness I'd found. But when I prayed about each of my friends, I felt nothing. Then I thought about a girl in my Spanish class. She was slightly more than an acquaintance at the time; I think she'd hung out with us outside of school once. Oh, but she was ready.

I told God that I was too scared to talk to her about church, but she started asking me questions. She asked if she could go with me to seminary (at 5:50 in the morning!!) and to church (for three hours!). Pretty impressive for a 17-year-old. Her life began to change before my eyes as she drank up every word of truth given to her. It was one of the greatest blessings to watch her grow and change. That girl was a rock. Still is. In fact, she is a lovely woman with a husband and adorable baby girl now. And I still love her like a sister. Always will. Happy birthday, Rach! Even though I know you aren't reading this, I'll be thinking of you all day today.

Friday, February 18, 2011

Romance in the Air

Don't worry. This isn't a mushy post. Sometimes Ryan talks about all the other men he beat off to get me. It's sweet but entirely untrue. Ryan's not the jealous type anyway, but he definitely has no need to be. However, last weekend was quite lively in that department.

First, I was almost set up by a woman at the storehouse. She wanted me to go out with her 40-year-old-Starwars-loving son. Well, or the 38-year-old son if I preferred. Both still live at home. She was very disappointed the find that I was married but perked up when she found out I had no children. She had some very graphic advice on how to remedy the childless situation. Apparently after six years of marriage, Ryan and I are.....uh....doing it wrong. I've never been more horrified in my life.

Then, there's Hank. I was planning on going to lunch with friends and texted them to make sure we were still on. Here is the conversation:

Me: Are you still good for tomorrow?
Reply: Huh? Who is this?
Me (thinking my friend was being funny): Christie. :) Wait, isn't this Jen?
Reply: Only if ur really attractive would I let u call me Jen! Lol! I think u have the wrong number. Im Hank.

Considering Hank could be 62 or 12, I did not answer him. Although he could be a funny guy.

Monday, February 14, 2011

Men on Valentine's Day

I just got home from the grocery store. I was making my weekly trip and didn't even think about it being Valentine's Day until I got there. It was VERY hard not to giggle at the poor, bewildered men trying to find something worthwhile on the emptied shelves at Smith's. I even saw somebody's husband from church. Should I rat his ill-preparedness out?

While I found the situation both endearing and amusing, I also felt very proud of Ryan. Even though he's been really sick all weekend, he surprised me last night with some gorgeous multi-colored roses when I got home from my little weekend getaway. He was rewarded with a big bag of M&M's. Now, if you'll excuse me I need to pull my tuna chicken noodle casserole out of the oven. Aren't we romantic?

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Home

My brother sent me this link a couple of months ago. Even though the hype is probably past, I'm one of those people that hangs on. For example, I was probably the last person in the United States still listening to the blue song* when everyone else wanted to punch out the radio. Anyway, in case you haven't seen this one or want to watch it for the 100th time . . .



*Forgive me for posting to Eiffel 65. It's worse than rick-rolling somebody.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Ten Reasons We Love Jimmer

It's true. We're totally into Jimmer at our house. Here are the top ten reasons why:

1 - He takes the stupidest shots and makes them. Again and again.
2 - If you guard him too close (you know, to avoid the above problem) he'll burn you bad. Or break your ankles in a crossover.
3 - He works hard. He may have some heavy raw talent, but he's absolutely worked to get where he is.
4 - He's getting all kinds of good press for BYU. I LOVE hearing ESPN talking up the Jimmer.
5 - He's not afraid to pass the ball. Yeah, he shoots. A lot. But he can pass too.
6 - He's the kind of player my dad would've loved. When we're watching him sink a shot four feet behind the three-point line, I can just picture my dad both cheering and laughing too.
7 - He's pretty humble. I don't know how long that will last, but for now he takes much less credit than he deserves. Why did BYU have such a good game, Jimmer? He says they really stepped up the rebounding in the second half. Yes--the rebounding, not the 40+ points he scored.
8 - I don't know how to put it except that he really is just plain fun to watch.
9 - Even Nelly is into Jimmermania.
10 - It's kind of refreshing to hear about somebody besides Bronco for a change (not that we don't love him too).

Monday, February 7, 2011

Stick in the Mud

So most of my recent blogging has been either boring or too serious or both. Today I was thinking of a funny story and thought I'd share.

My brother and I were playing at the beach during a trip to California. Not sure how old I was but probably too old for what we were doing. Instead of building castles like normal people, we dug a hole. A pretty good sized hole. Like a foot deep and two feet diameter. Then, heaven only knows why, we thought it would be funny to put a stick right in the middle.

You know how giggling brothers and sisters get. We thought it would be funny because somebody wouldn't see it and totally get stabbed by the stick. It was a stupid idea. Who wouldn't see the stick? It was right in the middle of this gaping hole in the middle of the level beach.

Well. Apparently somebody. This man totally tripped over it (better than being impaled, right?) and then (okay, I know nobody else will find this story funny at all, but I'm actually laughing while I'm typing this) he yells, "Who put that stick there?!" He was so angry. We laughed so hard. Of course we waited until he was out of ear shot. I think you had to be there, but we thought we were hilarious. It was one of the best things we did on the trip. Did I mention I think I was 13-14-ish? Not 6 or 7 like you're probably thinking.